May 2019 - Page 4 of 4 - A Sweet Smelling Savour

“God’s Sustaining Grace”

My name is Rebekah Bursell Chacon. I am a missionary kid from Alaska who now serves as a missionary, alongside my Peruvian husband, in Peru. You can visit our FB page The Chacon Family and see what we are about and doing. I am a mama to two active little boys and am expecting a third bundle of joy in October. It is for that reason I am writing this devotional.

Missionary life, like any life, has its exciting moments. One of our exciting moments was when we hit 100% support and bought tickets to Peru! The goal we had been sharing for 3 years had finally become a reality! Soon after we moved to the city where we were going to live and work. My husband began working on building our home. The dream was alive!

Often however, those wonderful dreams cause us to forget the difficult reality that we live in a sin-cursed world and things will not always be shiny and sparkly. Sometimes the dust and daily grind and overflowing sink and endless laundry cloud out those dreams. Sometimes being a stay-at-home-mom becomes frustrating because “all” you do is stay at home. Sometimes the dream loses its sparkle. But God’s grace is greater.

The most difficult time for me began with the most exciting possibility. I had been feeling lousy for a week or so: little energy, easily frustrated, upset tummy. I finally decided to take a pregnancy test. It was positive!! God has blessed us with another baby! Just like my other pregnancies, I feel tired. Unlike my other pregnancies, almost everything I eat gives me indigestion.

Trying to keep up with housework and two little energetic boys has become a very challenging task. The housework became overwhelming. Keeping the boys from fussing was harder with less energy. The heat makes me tired. The rainy days make me sleepy. The shiny sparkly dream is gone, and a tired, sleepless reality has taken its place. But in that tired reality God has been able to show me things about myself and, more importantly, about Himself.

First I need to stop trying to do it all myself. Confidence is great when it is rooted in Christ. I need to admit my inability to do it all. I need to cast my cares on Him each moment. I need to depend on His strength, instead of making it through each hour while thinking, “It’s almost bedtime.”

Second I need to refocus. Phil 4:8 needs to become a reality. I do not always think on things that are true, honest, pure, and lovely. God showed me that His Word needs to take over my mind. My untrue thoughts suck away any extra energy I have.

I often catch myself thinking about how unfair things are for ME. But a Godly woman does not focus on herself, she serves selflessly. Recently I’ve been reading to my boys about how Jesus washed His disciples’ feet. He their Creator, knelt and washed their feet. I, a simple fellow-human, can do no less.

The Lord has also brought to mind many times that this world is not my home. If things never change and the shiny dream fades away forever, it will actually be okay because He’s got something SO much better ahead for me. If I get so focused on making this my best life, I’m not living with eternity in mind. Col. 3:2 tells us to set our affection on things above, not on this earth. He wants my affections. He wants to be my passion. He wants to be the most important.

I thank Him for this difficult time. It’s not over, but His grace is sufficient, and His plan is perfect. He’s working on me and molding me and for that I am so grateful.

“Fear thou not; for I am with thee: be not dismayed; for I am thy God: I will strengthen thee; yea, I will help thee; yea, I will uphold thee with the right hand of my righteousness.” Isaiah 41:10

I am 53 years old, and I have been married for 35 years to the best husband God ever made! (sorry, girls!) I have 2 sons who are 31 and 33; 3 beautiful granddaughters, and another grand on the way! I am a First Generation Christian. I was raised in a nominally Catholic home, but got saved when I was 20 while we were stationed in Madrid, Spain. We were called into Full-Time Service in 1991, and for the last 20 years, have served as Church-Planters in Zacatecas, Mexico, and Tucson, Arizona.

I would like to speak to you about the Grace of God that is present even when we are unaware. When I was 9, my parents divorced. I was an only child. Ultimately, my dad was awarded custody of me due to abandonment/neglect issues concerning my mother. It was not long before I began to be sexually abused by my father. This continued off and on until I was 15, at which time I was considering suicide. It was during this time that I met my now-husband. A few months later, in hopelessness, I called my mom and asked her if she would come and get me. After I told her what had been going on, she accused me of lying. I was crushed, and seemingly abandoned again. She took me back to my dad’s house to get my things. She also sought counseling for me. I was eventually referred to a group called Daughters United; for girls who had been sexually abused. It is during this time that the Grace of God was actively at work in my life, yet I didn’t know it until almost 15 years later.

Let me jump ahead and give you the retrospective; when my sons reached the ages when my abuse had begun, I became overwhelmed with feelings of anger, resentment, and hatred towards my father, “How COULD you?! I was just a little girl!!” I became eaten up with these sinful emotions. Then, a sister in the Lord gave me a workbook for victims of abuse. I began to do the study, then one day the question came, Where was God during your abuse? I was floored. HE had let this happen to me! Why?! Where was He when a little girl who had been abandoned by everyone else in her life needed Him?! I became angry at God! Then, slowly, but surely, the Light began to dawn; He WAS there! I had felt Him in my room when I asked to die; I believe His angels took me in their arms and carried me safely over the threshold of death (being unsaved, I would have gone straight to Hell, otherwise).

Then, He brought me to Daughters United where I learned strategies to survive the abuse and neglect that I had suffered my whole life. But, more importantly, He had brought my 16 year-old boyfriend who drove me to the Daughters United meetings 2x/week, and waited in his car for me; he never asked me any questions. He was just there; quietly, patiently waiting for me. When I looked back and saw that the arms God had used to sustain me in that awful time were the arms of my husband, I was brought to my knees with thankfulness at the mighty and wondrous grace of God! He had never left me! Even in my unsaved state, He had sent a pair of loving arms to hold me, to comfort me, to be there in the darkness! (Isaiah 41:10)

Month: May 2019

Portraits of Grace – Rebekah Bursell Chacon

Portraits of Grace – Terri Shuerger